Hey there, so your relationship has unfortunately ended, at least for the time being, and you’ve tried your best to get your ex to change her mind, but found that it hasn’t worked. Don’t panic. Right now I’m going to teach you how to get your ex-girlfriend back and turn this whole situation around.
A while ago my partner left me also. She told me that she, “doesn’t want to be with anyone right now”, and wouldn’t even reply to my messages. Amazingly though, a few weeks later, we were (and are) back together, and things are now back the way they were back in the good old days.
We couldn’t be happier, and it’s all because of an old friend of mine from way back who showed me that there’s a specific get your girlfriend back process which you NEED to follow if you’re going to succeed in getting your girl back.
To fast-track the process, please see my step-by-step ex-back video which covers the simple yet counter-intuitive and surprising steps you’ll need to take.
If however you’d rather read the steps as text on this page, here are the core steps which reveal how to get your ex-girlfriend back:
Step 1. Establish who broke up with who
The approach we will take on how to make your ex-girlfriend want you back will depend on WHO initiated the breakup. That is to say that different breakup circumstances require differing approaches.
So did she end it, or did you? If she ended the relationship and you just want things to go back to the happy way they used to be, then proceed on to step 2 just below.
If however you let her go but you’ve realized you made a huge mistake, and now you want her back, then see my article about that specific situation, because all of the steps on this page show you how to get your ex-girlfriend back if it’s the woman who ended it, since that is the most common scenario, by far.
Step 2. Learn WHY the breakup happened
Our first priority is to make sure that whatever it is you did (or didn’t do) that made your ex want to end things – we discover what that was NOW. Because only by knowing what that behavior was, can you be able to put a stop to it, and thus enable the get her back process I’m about to detail, to work.
She will likely have told you some wishy-washy reason for why she ended it. Maybe she told you the old clichéd, “It’s not you, it’s me”, or perhaps the classic, “I just need some space”, or as in my case back in the day, “I don’t want to be with anyone at all right now”.
Whatever reason she gave you, it will likely NOT have given you any actual clue as to WHAT exactly went wrong. This is typical of the female kind, but I’m a fellow man who’s in your corner, and I can tell you the cause straight up after a little investigating. So, let’s do that investigating…
There are 3 possible reasons why your ex-girlfriend might have ended your relationship. I’ve labelled them as Categories A, B and C. We need to figure out which Category your situation fits into. I’ve found over the years that 93% of my website visitors situations fit into Category A.
Category A: Your ex-girlfriend stopped feeling attracted to you
When a woman stops feeling attracted to her boyfriend (or fiancé or husband), the relationship essentially goes stale for her. And if she has any ‘mate value’ (value in the dating market), then sooner or later she will leave her boyfriend so that she can go find a new guy − one who she will feel an attraction for.
Like I said, this is the most common type of breakup scenario – where the woman leaves the man because she lost attraction for him. And that’s why it makes total sense to check if that is your situation first of all.
Here’s how to know if loss of attraction is the root cause of YOUR breakup:
Think about your relationship with your ex-girlfriend during the final few weeks/months/year of it, and answer YES or NO to the following questions:
Did you try your best to be extra nice to her all the time?
If you were super nice to your ex-girlfriend literally all the time, then the attraction mechanism in her brain would have interpreted that behavior by you as an ongoing attempt to gain her acceptance and approval. The problem with this is that the way the female attraction mechanism works, approval seeking behavior from men conveys low mate value about us…
Because the way the female attraction mechanism in your ex (and every woman) sees it, IF your mate value wasn’t lower than hers, then…you WOULDN’T have felt the need to try so hard/be so nice, to gain her approval. Instead, you would’ve known your mate value was plenty high enough for her already (i.e. that you already HAD her approval), such that you’d have felt NO NEED to use super nice behavior, to seek her approval.
Your partner’s attraction mechanism detecting that you have lower mate value than her is a problem, because that attraction mechanism has an instinctive urge to make her create the strongest possible offspring, meaning it is ONLY receptive to men it deems to have higher (than her) or at least equal (to her), mate value. This is in order to pass along the best genetics and thus keep the human race as strong as possible.
And so if your ex’s attraction mechanism detected that you have lower mate value than her, this would’ve removed a lot of the attraction she used to feel for you, to prevent the creation of weaker offspring than she’s capable of.
So unfortunately, if you’ve been overly nice to your ex-girlfriend, that will have made her believe you have lower mate value than her. Because the approval-seeking intent behind nice behavior is a sign to her attraction mechanism that you were trying to compensate for having lower mate value than her. That’s just HOW the female attraction mechanism is encoded to interpret approval-seeking behavior from men.
And of course, if your ex-girlfriend’s attraction mechanism detected that you have lower mate value than her, then she would’ve lost attraction to you from that. And without attraction, of course relationships can’t survive.
So if you answered, “yes” to this first question of, “Did you try your best to be extra nice to your ex all the time?”, then the cause of your breakup is almost certainly lost attraction (Category A).
Note: I imagine you’ve read through that explanation and may now be thinking something along the lines of, “Wow, I didn’t realize female attraction works that way, and that this is where I went wrong!”
If you’re thinking that, then I sympathize as I’ve been there. But fear not! I will show you how to win her back if you stick with me. Now that we know you have a lost attraction case, go ahead and watch my step-by-step video on how to get your ex-girlfriend back IN that specific type of situation.
Did you do everything your ex-girlfriend ever asked (or told) you to do?
Just like with being nice all the time, doing everything your ex ever asked or told you to do, especially in moments when you didn’t want to do it, would’ve shown her attraction mechanism that you were trying super hard to gain her approval. This would’ve caused attraction loss for the same reason that being super nice to her would − the female attraction mechanism interprets approval-seeking behavior from men as an indicator of low mate value in us, thus it causes lost attraction.
That means you answering, “yes” to this question of, “Did you do everything your ex-girlfriend ever asked (or told) you to do?”, would indicate that you have a lost attraction (Category A) situation.
Note: From this point on, any question that you answer “no” to, feel free to skip the explanation of that question below it, and scroll down to the next question.
Did you give your ex compliments on a regular basis?
Regular compliments, if you were giving them to your ex, would’ve been seen by her as attempts by you to gain her acceptance and approval. Of course her attraction mechanism would’ve taken this as an indication that your mate value is lower than hers. From there, lost attraction and a breakup would’ve become likely.
As well as that though, a woman who has any degree of mate value will start to think of a guy who regularly compliments her (even a boyfriend or husband), as a fanboy. Do female celebs date their fans? Of course not! They date other celebs, who have a social and mate value as high as their own, or even higher than their own.
By complimenting your ex-girlfriend consistently, you would’ve become somewhat of a fanboy in her mind, and this would’ve represented another sign to her attraction mechanism that your mate value is lower than hers. And of course, once a girlfriend feels that her man’s mate value is lower than hers, lost attraction sets in, and from there, a breakup is a matter of time.
Did you give your ex gifts regularly, especially at times when she was demanding or at least hinting that she wanted them?
Consistent gift giving would’ve made your ex think you were trying too hard to win her approval. See a pattern developing here? The root cause of lost attraction cases usually stems from the man behaving in ways which convey to the woman that HE doesn’t believe his mate value is high enough for her, and thus he doesn’t believe he has her approval yet, and needs to work hard to get it.
Regular gift giving is one such tryhard behavior that conveys this. It creates a dynamic in which you as the man are demonstrating to your partner that it’s you trying to win her approval. This then makes her believe she has higher mate value than you… Because the way the female attraction mechanism sees it, if that wasn’t true, then there’s just no way you’d be trying this hard.
As you know by now, women don’t stay attracted to men who they believe they have higher mate value than. So if you bought your ex lots of gifts, you can consider that to have reduced her attraction to you and harmed your relationship unfortunately, despite your best intentions.
After starting a relationship with your ex, did you change your life in ways that would’ve made very clear to her she was the most important thing in your life?
On the surface, it makes logical sense that showing a girl she’s your everything should BOOST her attraction to you…because after all, surely every girl wants to be the center of her partner’s universe, right?
WRONG. The truth is, your ex no doubt wanted to be important to you, but she also without question wanted you to have OTHER things in your life that didn’t involve her…
Because if you made your life all about her, then it would’ve become clear to her that she had you 100% by the balls. And women lose attraction to men who they feel they’ve won over too fully like this. Why?
Because the way their attraction mechanism sees it, if you’re this head over heels in love with them − to the point that you’ve even given up some or all of the activities you used to do, to prioritize them instead − then, perhaps you feel you’re punching above your weight in being with them and are so excited about dating someone as amazing as them, that you cut back on other things you used to do, to spend more time with them.
That’s how the female attraction mechanism interprets a guy making his whole life about his girl… It interprets it to mean that HE believes SHE has much higher mate value than him.
This then tempts her herself to think that she has higher mate value than him, and is out of his league. And that then makes her think she could do better than him. And that’s the LAST thing you want a girlfriend thinking, because it’s a recipe for lost attraction and a breakup.
Contrary to making your life all about your partner, and from that coming across to her as being head over heels in love, instead women need an element of CHALLENGE in their man… Sure yes they need to feel that they’ve won you over, but not 100%/head over heels. And to keep them on their toes and away from wondering whether they are out of your league, you should never let the percentage that they feel they’ve won you over, quite reach 100% certainty in their mind.
This way, the few percentile doubt that they still feel about how much they’ve really won you over, will mean it’ll instead be them who will have background questions in their mind about whether maybe you are wondering if you are out of their league. And a girlfriend who sometimes questions this, will remain super convinced that her man has very high mate value, and thus will always remain smitten with him.
But again, if your ex-girlfriend became your whole world, and you dropped other aspects of your life to spend more time with her, then the percentage that she felt she had you won over definitely DID reach 100% certainty in her mind. This would surely have been a contributing factor towards your breakup, for the reasoning I mentioned above.
Already given, “Yes” answers to 3+ of those first 5 questions?
If you’ve answered, “yes” to 3 or more of the questions I asked above, then forget the remainder of this article, and go watch my step-by-step ex-back video that is designed for lost attraction cases. Why? Because 3+ “yeses” at this point already make it abundantly clear to me that here we have a lost attraction-caused (Category A) breakup.
That means this article has done its job, and you’re now ready to move on to the next part of the ex-back process, which is to watch that video. Please go watch the video now.
Did you verbally stress how committed you were to your ex-girlfriend?
Showing a girlfriend so clearly like this that she 100% had you locked down by the balls would’ve taken away the excitement she used to feel from the challenge of keeping you interested. Again, women need that challenge-based excitement in order to maintain their interest (in you).
You stressing your commitment would also have indicated to her that you weren’t desirable in the dating market – that you weren’t desirable to other women. Because the way the female attraction mechanism sees it, if you were desirable to other women, then you would’ve been UNworried enough about the potential of not being with her, due to your desirability to other women, that you’d have felt NO NEED to stress your commitment.
And so if you DID stress your commitment in your relationship, the only way your ex’s attraction mechanism would’ve been able to interpret that is to see it as meaning you’re not desirable to other women, and therefore you badly NEED her and thus were stressing your commitment in a bid to make her feel super secure in the relationship, so that you wouldn’t lose her − your only option.
Of course the irony of doing that, if you did it, is that the exact action you took to make sure you wouldn’t lose her, likely helped CAUSE the very outcome you were trying to avoid… Sucks that it works this way, but again, understanding all of this is the first part of executing a plan on how to get your ex-girlfriend back. We are executing that plan right now.
…So once your ex concluded that your declarations of commitment meant you weren’t desirable in the dating market, that would’ve lowered your mate value in her eyes. And of course, once a girl concludes that your mate value isn’t as high as she had previously thought, from that, she then begins to question whether she’s out of your league and could do better. It’s then a slippery slope from there.
Did you usually make first contact with your ex, on any given day?
Women are a lot like cats in the sense that if you make a big effort to pursue and chase them, they run away. Yet if you’re LESS proactive, they often come to you on their own.
If, more often than not you were the one making first contact on any given day in your relationship, then your persistent first messages and calls were creating a dynamic in which you were chasing your ex. Why does this harm attraction?
Because in the same way that the female attraction mechanism perceives that it’s lower mate value people who seek approval and validation from higher mate value people, it ALSO perceives that lower mate value people CHASE AFTER higher mate value people.
So if you were making noticeably more effort, by reaching out to your ex a lot more often than she was, then unknowingly you were creating a chasing dynamic that was telling her her mate value is higher than yours. This of course would’ve led to heavy attraction loss.
The good news though, about this way that the female attraction mechanism works, is that your mate value in a woman’s eyes is only ever as low or high as your behavior makes it. It is only partially related to your looks, wealth etc. This is good news for you, because it means that you can CONTROL how high or low your mate value comes across to women.
My number one objective on this website is to help men make adjustments to their behavior around women, such that their mate value TO those women comes across MUCH higher than it did before. This way, men including yourself can get your ex back, or be able to attract and keep a woman who’s just as suitable as the ex was.
The fact that how high or low your mate value comes across to women is WITHIN your control – this fact is why no guy reading this has any excuse for not being able to become the kind of guy his ex wants for a relationship again. You can become that guy, and we are undergoing the process of achieving it right now.
Let’s move on to the next part of the ex-back process. Go ahead and watch my step-by-step video on how to get an ex-girlfriend back in a lost attraction case like yours, by tapping the menu at the top of your screen and then tapping, “Ex-Back Video Guide”.
Did you tell your ex-girlfriend you love her before she did the same?
If you did this, then it would’ve shown her that you were more involved in the relationship than she was… It would’ve shown her that you were more serious about her than she was about you.
This would’ve indicated to her that perhaps your mate value is lower than hers, because the way the female attraction mechanism sees it, a man of equal or higher mate value would’ve taken her more time and effort than that to fully ‘win over’, to a point where she would probably have found herself being the one to drop the “I love you” bomb first…
Because the female attraction mechanism knows very well that it takes MORE time and effort to make a high mate value man fall in love. And again, that attraction mechanism knows that if a guy does indeed have very high mate value, then it will probably be the girl herself who falls in love first (or at least it will appear that way to her), and it knows that she’ll be the one who’s more involved in and serious about, the relationship.
That’s the way you want it to appear to any female partner you have – that SHE is the one who has fallen in love first, EVEN IF that’s not the case and it’s you who’s fallen first. And again, that’s because letting a girl realize that you fell in love before she did would tell her that her mate value is higher than yours, which would cause lost attraction.
Therefore, in your relationship with your ex, if you did let her know that you fell in love first, that likely caused lost attraction in her, which contributed to your breakup.
Did you give your ex-girlfriend signs of affection (kisses etc) more regularly than she gave you them?
This is another example of the guy coming across to the girl as being more involved in the relationship than she was. Like I mentioned in the previous question, the guy seeming more involved in and serious about a relationship than the girl is, tells her that HIS mate value is probably lower than hers, and that thus she is probably dating down and could do better. It goes without saying at this point, but of course this causes lost attraction.
Do you have photos of the two of you together, in which your ex is looking at the camera, yet you are looking at her?
This is a classic telltale sign that you were more involved in the relationship than your ex was. Why? Because in a photo which fits that description, you’re fixated on her and thus very clearly into her, yet while she may’ve been into you too, it clearly wasn’t as much given that she was more concerned about posing for the camera EVEN THOUGH you were looking at her. Based on my experience in helping many guys win their ex-girlfriend back, in my opinion, a photo like this is an obvious sign that you were more serious about your ex than she was about you.
Of course I already explained why demonstrating to a partner that you’re more serious about her than she is about you, damages attraction and thus puts a relationship in jeopardy.
When decisions needed to be made in your relationship, did you mostly leave it to your ex to make them?
One attractive trait a man can show that will always keep his partner’s attraction for him high, is LEADERSHIP. This means making the important decisions by yourself by default if your girl doesn’t have a strong opinion about what to decide.
But just as leading through making decisions shows strength and power about you and thus keeps attraction high, equally, failing to lead, and showing uncertainty about what to decide, and leaving it to your partner instead, shows weakness, which lowers attraction.
In other words, the female attraction mechanism VALUES leadership in a man, yet it PUNISHES lack of leadership. Therefore, if, when decisions needed to be made, you usually left those decisions to your ex, her attraction mechanism would’ve had a problem with that lack of leadership by you, and that would’ve lowered her attraction for you and contributed to the breakup.
With sex, did you ASK your ex to change positions? Or worse, in bed, did you let her take control and lead?
If you did either of these things, it’s another example of the man in the relationship failing to lead. If you were passive in bed and thereby made her feel like she had to lead, it’s perhaps even an example of you behaving submissively.
Nowhere is male leading and dominating, combined with female following and submitting, more important to the female attraction mechanism, than in bed. When a man fails to lead in the bedroom, attraction loss (in the woman) is not if, but when.
Do you feel that your ex is the highest mate value woman you were, and are, capable of getting?
If yes, then believing that your partner is that one special snowflake, and that no other woman living in your area is anywhere near as great as she is, will surely have created a scarcity mindset in you based around her, which would’ve brought out all the needy, desperate and try-hard (i.e. unattractive) types of behavior that we discussed above. It would surely have helped to CAUSE those behaviors, and thus resulted in lost attraction.
So a “yes” answer to this question as well, would just serve to rubberstamp the fact that lost attraction (Category A) is the cause of your breakup, like it is in most guys situations.
Toward the end of your relationship, did your ex-girlfriend regularly get bitchy about something you allegedly did wrong, even though you could see that usually you’d done nothing wrong?
This is a classic SIGN of lost attraction, which usually happens as a result of the cause behaviors of lost attraction outlined in the questions above. It happens when the girl feels frustrated from still being in a relationship with a guy who she’s decided has lower mate value than her, and who therefore, she doesn’t feel very attracted to anymore. Her bitchy outbursts over nothing are a venting of that frustration.
Such outbursts are a sign and symptom of lost attraction, rather than a cause. But if your reaction to such outbursts in your ex was to fold, and to fail to stand up for yourself, and to allow her to disrespect you like that, and to perhaps even apologize to her even though you did nothing wrong, then from that she’ll have seen weakness in you. And that will just have made the lowering attraction issue even worse, especially if she could see that her bitchiness got to you emotionally and from that, she detected even more weakness in you.
You may feel like I’m really grilling your approach to relationships here, for which I apologize. Again, I sympathize, because I’ve been there. Like I said though, there’s a positive purpose to all this…
You need to see WHAT went wrong first, so that when you learn and then apply my other how to win your ex-girlfriend back steps (coming next), you won’t be sabotaging the effectiveness of those steps by behaving in unattractive ways that caused the breakup in the first place.
Did your ex seem to go off sex and let it become less frequent, or even stop giving it to you entirely? Or, did you find yourself having to ASK for it to get it, or even beg for it?
Less frequent sex is another common symptom of lost attraction, which results from the causes of lost attraction outlined in the questions above. It would further serve to confirm that your situation is Category A − lost attraction.
If that’s now confirmed, then go ahead and move onto my video which covers how to get your ex-girlfriend back in a Category A situation like yours, by clicking the link just below!
Answered, “Yes” to 3+ of those questions above? Loss of attraction caused your breakup, 100%
If you identified that three or more of the scenarios described in the questions above happened during the latter stages of your relationship with your ex-girlfriend, then the reason your breakup happened is because her attraction to you faded out.
How can we be absolutely sure of that?
Well, if at least three of those scenarios I asked you about DID happen in your relationship, and you also got broken up with rather than you ended it, then the fact that both those things happened in your own life, and that I was able to call both out despite the fact I’ve never met you and can’t possibly know the ins and outs of your relationship…the fact I was able to call both those things out should be all the evidence you need.
I guess you’re now feeling a bit defeated, and again I sympathize because I’ve been there and remember it well. And while knowing the cause of your breakup is a solid start for putting into action a plan on how to get your ex-girlfriend back, it still now leaves you wondering, “So what do I DO?! How do I get my ex-girlfriend back?”
The next step is to watch my get your girlfriend back video for Category A situations. Go ahead and watch that video now, to learn what your plan of action needs to be to get your girlfriend back IN your specific situation.
Category B: Your ex found you too difficult to get relationship progress and/or security out of, and left due to that
It’s entirely possible for a woman to be highly attracted to her man, yet still dump him regardless. When this happens, it’s usually a result of her on the one hand WANTING to be with him, yet on the other hand simultaneously feeling she cannot and must leave. Why?
Because something about his actions (or lack of) makes her feel like he’s NOT really that committed to her. She feels like, although she’s attracted to him, he isn’t ultimately going to give her what she wants and needs from a relationship, which is steps forward such as moving in together, marriage, kids and a secure relationship in which to raise those kids… She feels like the relationship isn’t moving forward toward those goals, which evolution has hardwired her to seek out.
And because evolution has hardwired her to seek out those goals, and because the human race is reliant on women hitting such goals so that we avoid extinction – because of that, women are ALSO hardwired to feel like wanting to leave any man who, after a certain amount of time, evidently isn’t going to help them hit said goals. This way, they’re freed up to go find a man who WILL facilitate those goals − for the sake of the continuation of the human race.
After how much time might a woman begin to feel this way and want to leave her man due to this issue? After a minimum of about TWO years of a relationship, she may begin to feel this way and want to leave over it. It can take longer than that depending on the woman, but generally speaking, it may occur after about the two-year mark, or beyond.
Therefore, if by the time your relationship reached the two or maybe three or even four-year mark, you had failed to take actions which would’ve moved that relationship down the path of steps forward like living together, marriage or having a child with your ex, and you also DON’T believe that lost attraction (Category A) is the problem in your case, then instead, the problem may well be lack of relationship progress and/or security (Category B), which led to your breakup.
To figure out whether or not that’s your situation, think about your relationship with your ex over the past several weeks/months/year, and answer YES or NO to the following four questions. The first question is simple:
Did your relationship fail to evolve over time?
Women are ticking time bombs in terms of their fertility, so you had better believe that there’s an evolutionary part of your ex’s brain driving her toward the goal of having a child, especially if she hasn’t had any kids at all yet.
For that reason, childless women especially need to see progress after the first couple of years of their relationship – progress which indicates to them that they are on course to have a child and have a secure relationship in which to raise that child.
If however your ex already has at least one child, either by you or from a past relationship, then a lack of progress toward having another child is less likely to have been the issue. She would still however have wanted to see progress in the security of the relationship for the sake of the child(ren) she already has; progress such as moving in together, and/or marriage, and/or financial support from you.
So I’m definitely NOT saying that you should for sure have been trying to have a child with your ex recently. I’m just saying that your relationship should have been very gradually progressing into more and more serious territory, on the path toward ultimately one day building a family together, be that a family made up of kids you guys already had from previous relationships, or kids you’d potentially have together, or a mix of both.
If however your relationship stopped progressing toward that outcome, and didn’t gradually become more serious after the first 2-4 years, then this lack of progress would have violated your ex’s desire for…relationship progress. It would have made her realize that you weren’t going to give her a family and a secure environment (i.e. secure relationship) in which to raise that family. She would then have seen you as a poor suitor, and felt compelled to leave you so that she could go find someone who might give her what she’s hardwired to desire – offspring, and the relationship security that she needs in order to raise said offspring.
What are some typical signs of lack of relationship progress?
Any scenario in which your ex-girlfriend hinted or clearly showed you that she wanted a particular step forward to happen between you two, yet you refrained from allowing it to materialize in the months after she showed that she wanted it − any scenario like that would reveal lack of relationship progress.
For example:
− If you refrained from allowing you guys to become an exclusive couple after she hinted or outright said that she wanted that 3+ months ago.
− If you refrained from allowing you guys to move in together after she started hinting toward or saying she wanted that 3+ months ago.
− If you continued to use contraception after she hinted or outright said she wanted a baby 3+ months ago.
− If you refrained from asking her to marry you after she hinted at wanting marriage 6+ months ago.
If your ex in some way revealed to you that she wanted any of the above steps forward to happen, and you didn’t facilitate and bring to fruition the particular step forward that she wanted in the months after you became aware that she wanted it, then your relationship probably failed to progress at a pace she saw as acceptable. And because of that, she likely felt it meant that you weren’t, in a reasonable timeframe, going to give her what she wanted (a secure relationship which had the potential to become a family), and so she probably broke things off because of that.
Were you overly mean/nasty to your ex-girlfriend?
Being a bit of an asshole to a partner just occasionally is generally a pretty healthy thing for a relationship. That’s because behaving like that shows her that you aren’t afraid of displeasing her, which tells her you’re not afraid to lose her, which in turn tells her you’re a desirable man in the dating market. Because she knows that if you weren’t desirable in the dating market, then there’s just no way you’d take the risk of being a bit mean/nasty to her.
Of course, if your behavior indicates to your partner that you’re desirable in the dating market, evidently to her, that must mean you’re the high mate value type of guy she should want for a relationship.
That’s how the female attraction mechanism interprets occasional displays of assholery from men. Such mischievous behavior tells a woman’s attraction mechanism that here is a man who evidently isn’t afraid to displease her and potentially lose her… Which means, the way her attraction mechanism sees it, that evidently here is a guy who is desirable in the dating market, because if he wasn’t, then he wouldn’t have DARED to be a little mean to her and from that risked losing her… Because she knows that a guy who wasn’t desirable in the dating market definitely WOULDN’T risk losing her like that.
And so if, from him risking losing her by being a bit of an asshole, it becomes evident to her that he is desirable in the dating market, then clearly, he must be the high mate value type of guy she should want. If you’ve ever wondered why women tend to like ‘badboys’, well that’s why.
Assholery can easily be overdone though. The key is to make your assholish moments occasional. If they’re overdone, it makes the girl feel like her man isn’t fully obtainable…like she can’t maintain a close connection with him and from that, feel the relationship security that she needs to feel in order to be confident she has a stable situation in which to potentially raise a family.
Even if your ex doesn’t want kids, or is a bit older and is past the age of raising a family at this point, overdoing the assholery would still probably have led to her feeling a lack of connection and security in your relationship, and eventually to her wanting to break up because of that.
So if in your relationship, you were too much of an asshole to your ex-girlfriend…if you were too drastic or too consistent with the assholery, then she may have decided to end that relationship due to the way such behavior would’ve told her there was just no way you were ever going to give her what she ultimately wanted from a relationship…security, and potentially children who could be raised comfortably within that security.
If that sounds like your situation, then Category B here is your Category.
Were you too aloof in your relationship?
Make no mistake, a certain amount of aloofness and lack of feeling the need to try hard to please a partner, is attractive to her. Because the fact that you don’t feel the need to try very hard shows her that you’re not overly concerned about your relationship with her potentially failing… which tells her that you’re evidently a desirable man in the dating market. Because she knows that if you weren’t desirable in the dating market, and thus lacked options, then you’d try harder with her to make sure that you wouldn’t lose her, your only option.
So when you DON’T try hard, and are instead more aloof, evidently, the way her attraction mechanism will see it, that must mean you ARE a desirable man in the dating market, and thus must be the high mate value type of man she should want. Again, it’s just the way that the female attraction mechanism counter-intuitively, positively interprets certain types of behavior from men, including ALOOF behavior.
In contradiction to that though, it’s when you are TOO aloof, and make too little effort, that you may run into the potentially relationship-sabotaging problem of your partner feeling like you’re never going to give her what she ultimately wants from a relationship – a family, and/or security in that relationship, and due to that, her deciding to leave you.
But what does too aloof and too little effort entail? Examples would include if you rarely initiated first contact via text or call (and usually waited for her to do that instead), or if you too often didn’t listen to her when she was talking to you, or if you failed to give her support when she had problems, or forgot her birthday or valentine’s day…things like that.
If you did any of these kinds of lacking-enough-effort things during your relationship for whatever reason, be it due to exhaustion from work or for any other reason, then you probably came across to your ex as too aloof. She may then have broken up with you due to your too-aloof behavior telling her that you weren’t ever going to provide her with the secure relationship and eventually family setting that she wanted. This of course is the kind of situation that leaves a man searching online for how to get your ex-girlfriend back fast, which is what I am helping you to do.
Did you show far too HIGH mate value during your relationship?
It’s important of course to demonstrate high mate value to any partner, so that she stays attracted to you. It is however also possible to OVERDO the high mate value.
Cases of overdoing high mate value are rare, and if it turns out that you have a Category B situation, then it’ll probably be one of the OTHER Category B questions above that are the cause of/reason for your breakup. In some rare cases though, overdoing high mate value can be the issue, so I’ve included it here as a question.
The first example of how a man might overdo high mate value the way his partner sees it, is if his career or one of his hobbies involves him regularly spending time with many other attractive women.
Of course, him having social access to other attractive women heightens his mate value in his partner’s eyes, due to it implying preselection about him to her. But it may just make his mate value too high to her, because it may make her feel like her relationship with him couldn’t possibly be secure, owing to the fact that HIS lifestyle gives him such easy access to other attractive women.
And if she couldn’t feel secure in her relationship with him, and like that relationship would last without some other woman stealing him away from her, then due to her FEAR of that happening, she may possibly choose to break up with him, to prevent him from breaking up with her later on.
This would be a self-protection reflex in her against getting hurt by him in the future, whereby she’d sabotage the relationship at a time of her choosing, to prevent him from leaving/hurting her at a later date when she’d be caught off guard by it, and wouldn’t be emotionally prepared to deal with it.
So if, during your relationship with your ex, your lifestyle involved you having access to many other attractive women, then your mate value may have risen so high in her eyes that she might’ve felt like you were out of her league, and would one day hurt her by leaving her for someone else. Thus, it’s possible that she decided to leave first, to prevent you from hurting her later on.
Now the most extreme example of how a man could overdo high mate value, and the most extreme example of Category B overall, is if he cheated on his partner, and she found out about it, and she then decided to break up with him because of it.
If this occurred during your relationship, then obviously, you showed your ex very well that you’re a high mate value man, since she realized that you were able to attract this other woman. But in cheating, you’d have shown her TOO high mate value. And due to that, she would’ve realized that there’s just no way a secure and stable relationship was ever going to be possible with you, so she’d have left because of that.
One final example of how a man could overdo high mate value to his girl, is if he gained noticeably higher mate value than her, either by making improvements to himself, or by her mate value falling for some reason, OR by a combination of both those things.
For instance, if he got himself in great physical shape, while she meanwhile became fat, or was aging much faster than him, then she may at some point start to feel very insecure about herself becoming a lower mate value woman than he is as a man, and from that, figure that he’d for sure one day leave her when he’d find someone else who’s mate value is higher than hers and closer to his own. And upon her perceiving things this way, she may then initiate a breakup, to prevent herself from getting hurt by that potential scenario later on.
Again, cases of this are rare, since most women prefer to tie down the highest mate value man they can get and take their chances with a guy they feel has much higher mate value than them, and gamble on him sticking around EVEN IF they feel insecure about him potentially leaving them at some point for someone else more attractive than them.
Nonetheless, a breakup caused by a man’s mate value becoming noticeably higher than his woman’s, and her then leaving him due to her insecurity and fear that he’d leave her one day when he’d, at least in her mind, inevitably meet someone else more attractive than her, is still a possible breakup cause. Thus, while it’s rare, I’ve included it here regardless.
Answered, “yes” to any of the four Category B questions above? If so, your
ex-girlfriend may have found you too difficult to get relationship progress and/or security out of, and left you due to that
If you have a Category B situation, then while your ex-girlfriend’s attraction for you is most likely still intact, you instead have a very different problem than lost attraction. Instead, your problem is that you’ve NOT allowed her to have the relationship progress and/or security that she wanted, by way of that relationship becoming more serious.
With Category A, the problem is that the girl doesn’t want it to become more serious due to her losing attraction to her man. Whereas with Category B, the problem is that while YES the girl DOES want it to become more serious, her man didn’t allow her to have the serious step(s) forward that she wanted, IN a reasonable timeframe.
Obviously these two problems are very different from each other, so it makes sense that the solutions to them on how to get your ex-girlfriend back, are very different too. If you have a Category B situation, then here is what you should do to solve it.
Category C. Did you or your ex-girlfriend move away to another area?
This is the simplest situation in which to learn and apply how to get your ex-girlfriend back − the situation where one of you guys moved to another area, and the long-distance then placed between you made having a healthy relationship difficult.
Why is this the simplest situation to solve? Well if physical distance is the only problem standing between you guys, then it’s just a simple case of forming a plan to solve that distance issue. This would most likely involve either you planning to move nearer to where your ex lives, or her planning to move nearer to where you live.
It’s as simple as that, but of course simple doesn’t mean easy. Yes, moving is a simple concept, but it would still not be easy to implement, because it would still require both planning and time.
The good news though is that to get your ex-girlfriend back fast, all you need to do for now is put a PLAN in place on how you guys can one day live closer together. Once you have that plan established, and you both agree to it, you can then cope with the distance issue better because you’ll both know that one day fairly soon you’ll live closer together, if not TOgether.
So you just need to figure out HOW the distance issue can be solved within a timeframe that your ex could feasibly accept (perhaps 6-12 months). Then both agree to that plan, and you should find that this is enough to get you guys back together soon, albeit still in a long-distance capacity for the time being.
Your plan NEEDS to have you guys living near one another within the next year or so though, because any longer than that and your ex would probably struggle to stay motivated to persevere through the entirety of the long-distance period.
For more information on how to get your ex-girlfriend back now when the issue you’re facing is that you guys live too far away from each other (Category C), read my article on how to solve that problem here.
Have you read through Categories A, B and C and not picked the most relevant one to your situation yet? It’s decision time! Is your situation:
- Category A: Your ex-girlfriend lost attraction to you. Turns out 93% of people visiting my website are in THIS situation, so if in doubt, click this Category.
- Category B: Your ex-girlfriend found you too difficult to get relationship progress and/or security out of.
Research has shown me a minority of my website visitors are in this situation. - Category C: Yourself and your ex-girlfriend currently live too far apart. Another minority of my visitors are in this situation, I have found.
Click on the most relevant-seeming category above, so that we can continue and I can help you win your ex-girlfriend back!
NOTE: All steps below here on this page are supplementary to the key ones above. Your priority should be on clicking a Category above and following the plan of action I outline for your particular Category and situation. All of the steps below here on this page are generalized, and may or may not help in your particular case.
Step 3. Spend some time apart
Spending time away from your ex-girlfriend and giving her some space is an important part of the how to win an ex-girlfriend back process. Immediately after a breakup, it’s very clear that things have gone stale such that ANYTHING you could try other than giving her some time and space, would have a negative impact AT such an early stage.
Even steps which would WORK to get her back later on, would only make things worse so early on. Therefore, the step you should take is to spend some time apart and out of contact.
How much time though? And what if she tries to communicate with you DURING this time out of contact? Or, what if you guys have a child together, live together or work together…how does spending time apart and out of contact work then?
We’ll look at the answers to all of those questions in my article on using the no contact rule. But to give you a quick idea, you should look to give your ex MORE time and space than she might need. It’s always better to give an ex too much space, than not enough. Why?
Well, if you don’t give her enough space, then anything you try after that wouldn’t work, because she wouldn’t have had enough time and space yet to feel ‘fresh’ about you again, so you’d quickly find yourself back at square one.
On the other hand, if you give her more space than she might need, that may actually result in her missing you more, which would give you a nice advantage for attracting her back.
It’s also very hard to tell exactly how much space any given ex may need, so erring on the side of caution and giving her potentially a little too much space is the way to go.
Step 4. Improve your body language and vibe
To re-attract your ex-girlfriend, you’re going to need improvements to your body language and general ‘vibe’ to do some of the heavy lifting…once it gets to the stage where you’re looking to meet up with her, after giving her some space of course.
Up until now, your body language, and the vibe you’ve been giving off to your ex and others from that body language, have probably been lacking a tad, just like most men’s do unless they learn how to correct these things.
Signs that this is true for you would include if you tend not to take up much space in your environment, if you, without realizing it, lean your neck forward instead of up straight, if you hunch your shoulders…things like that. Many of us do these things unconsciously without realizing it, and unfortunately women interpret them as signs of weakness.
Obviously women, and that includes ex-girlfriends, want a man who seems strong and dominant. Therefore, if until now you’ve allowed these types of bad body language to creep in, that’s probably a part of why your ex-girlfriend decided to break up with you. And even if that’s not the case, nevertheless, making improvements to your body language and vibe could only help with attracting her back anyway.
In conclusion, your body language, and the vibe you give off from that body language, should be worked on no matter what. We need to get you behaving and coming across to people in a more confident, dominant and generally attractive manner. That way, when it comes time to meet up with your ex again, right away she’ll pick up on your new more attractive vibe, which will make tempting her back easier.
To get things to play out in this positive way though, first you need to practice using more attractive body language. This is something you should start practicing right away, WHILE you’re implementing The No Contact Phase (the step above this one). This way, when you do meet up with your ex again, she’ll feel very quickly that you have a sexier and more attractive presence.
Here are four easy ways to improve your body language, as well as the vibe you give off to your ex-girlfriend and others:
- Sit and stand up straight (don’t slouch).
- Keep your shoulders down (not hunched) and your neck straight (not leaning forward).
- Spread yourself out; take up plenty of space.
- Smile more with your eyes than your teeth.
These are all very subtle yet effective ways to improve your body language and vibe. They take some getting used to when you’re just starting out practicing them, but if you take them seriously and persist with them, they’ll quickly become good habits − meaning you’ll use them on autopilot when you see your ex.
Step 5. Attract her back without contacting her
During the time that you give your ex-girlfriend space, you should still nonetheless SUBcommunicate high mate value about yourself to her, of course without directly contacting her to do that. That is to say you should send out signals to her which will make clear you’re a high mate value man…only without sabotaging the space you’re giving her.
Playing it this way will give you the best of both worlds. It will allow you to improve your mate value in her mind, yet it won’t compromise the space she needs.
How then can you send out high mate value signals to your ex-girlfriend without contacting her?
Social media is a very useful tool for this. First thing you can do is post a photo of yourself out with your friends having fun, clearly not seeming too concerned about the breakup.
This will indicate to her high mate value about you, because if the photo conveys that the breakup doesn’t seem to have affected you too bad, then the way she’ll see it, evidently you know you could replace her if you needed to… Because she knows that if you couldn’t replace her, then you’d be far too upset about not being with her anymore, that you wouldn’t be so jovial when out with your friends…
And if she believes you’re able to replace her, and thus she KNOWS you’re an attractive man in the dating market, then that will only increase her perception of your mate value, which will help you to attract her back.
Why? Because there’s no greater sign of high mate value in the eyes of women, than a man’s perceived ability to attract OTHER women. And naturally, it’s signs OF high mate value, that attract women and indeed attract them back.
Therefore, if your ex has thoughts about you such as, “He’s out there maybe meeting and hooking up with other women!”, that WON’T work against you like you may think. It’ll probably work FOR YOU because of the way that an ex-girlfriend having thoughts like that RAISES your mate value in her mind.
Thus, your ex-girlfriend having those kinds of thoughts about you would be a GOOD thing. I mean sure, if she were to see PROOF that you actually HAVE a new girl, that may upset her and be a step too far, but it still wouldn’t reduce your mate value to her. Your mate value would still actually RISE from it higher in her mind.
And that happening could potentially override the fact that her seeing you as a desirable man via you spending time around other women, would upset her. Because after her initial upset from it passes, your then boosted mate value would shine through to her and become a main deciding factor in whether she chooses to go back to you or not…
Because that’s just the way that the female attraction mechanism works. Women are wired to tie down and keep tied down the highest mate value man they can get. Upset caused by that man is mostly inconsequential, so long as his mate value remains high.
It’s just the way the female attraction mechanism works. And this explains why many women go back to men who generally misbehave, or even cheat. As long as the guy’s mate value remains high, him causing them upset is a problem they’ll often choose to overlook in the end, all in the name of keeping the highest mate value man they can get.
So a perceived ability to attract other women is a GOOD thing in terms of getting your ex-girlfriend back, because it BOOSTS your mate value in her mind. The key word there is “perceived”. Perceived ability to attract other women. You don’t actually have to be able to attract lots of new women, you just have to get your ex THINKING that you could.
It’s her PERCEPTION of what’s true that’s important, and when you’re out there having fun with your friends and not seeming too concerned about the breakup, that will certainly make her realize that you could find a replacement for her IF you needed to. This, as I explained, is something which can help to re-attract her.
I have many more tips and tactics on how to win your ex-girlfriend back without contacting her. I’m ready to show you my best ones from many years of helping people via this website, in my new step-by-step get your girlfriend back video! Go ahead and tap the menu at the top of your screen, and then tap “Ex-Back Video Guide” to watch the video now!
Step 6. Before directly communicating with your ex-girlfriend again, learn the best way to handle getting back together discussions
If the steps in this guide on how to get your ex-girlfriend back work to make her want you back, then of course, sooner or later that’s going to lead to discussions between the two of you on getting back together.
It’s important that you handle these discussions in the right way. Because if you handle them wrongly, that can easily make a girl change her mind AGAIN and decide that getting back together wasn’t a good idea after all.
The wrong way to handle getting back together discussions is to either A. open them yourself, or B. when your ex opens them, instantly seem eager to take her back right away. Because handling them in either of those ways would make you seem perhaps more interested in and serious about her, than she might be about you, and that would tell her her mate value is higher than yours and she’s out of your league.
You don’t want her drawing that conclusion. So you need to be careful how much direct interest you show in getting back together. That’s why the best approach to handling getting back together discussions, is to patiently WAIT for your ex to start them herself. Then when she eventually does start them, take your sweet time thinking about it first before taking her back… As opposed to, snapping her hand off and instantly taking her back.
Again, instantly taking a woman back tends to backfire, because it makes YOU seem TOO interested in her. If you seem too interested, that tells her you’re not desirable in the dating market…because she knows that if you were desirable in the dating market, then you wouldn’t have seemed instantly convinced about the idea of taking her back.
And so that’s what you need to do: Avoid seeming instantly convinced about taking your ex-girlfriend back when she eventually does start discussions about that. This way, she’ll get to see that you are desirable in the dating market, and thus ARE the high mate value type of guy who she’s correct to want back.
Again though, you shouldn’t START discussions about getting back together because of how doing that would tell her you’re UNdesirable in the dating market, and thus are the low mate value type of guy she shouldn’t be with.
But this begs the question: If YOU shouldn’t ever start discussions with your ex about getting back together, then what if she never starts them either? How can you possibly get her back if neither of you ever open discussions on it?
Well the goal of the other steps in this guide on how to win your ex-girlfriend back, is to make her FEEL emotionally like she WANTS you back. Because remember, women make their love life decisions based on feeling; based on emotion… Even if their logical side tells them they’re making the wrong call, that doesn’t matter because EMOTION – how they FEEL about you, will override that.
So if the other steps in this guide work to make your ex FEEL like wanting you back, then sooner or later, she will feel compelled to start discussions about getting back together herself.
In other words, the answer to the question, “What if my ex never starts discussions on getting back together?”, is: She likely WILL start those discussions at some point SO LONG AS you take the correct steps to make her WANT to start them and have you back.
And that means your overall approach to getting back together discussions should be to FORGET about such discussions, and instead focus on taking steps which can change how she feels about you. This way, she’ll be the one to start the getting back together discussions herself once she’s ready for those discussions to go the way you want them to go.
Because after all, there’s no point in having such discussions until she’s actually ready for them to go how you want them to go. And when she IS ready for that…she’ll start them herself anyway.
And again, you should patiently WAIT for her to start them. And if/when she does, you should then take your sweet time mulling over whether or not to take her back, to show her that you’re NOT desperate to have her back and thus ARE the in-demand, high mate value guy who she should want back. And once she can see that’s the case, she’ll then want you back even more. And from there, getting back together will be a formality.
That’s really the only way getting back together can work and actually last. Because again, if YOU were the one to start discussions about getting back together, or if you were to instantly take your ex back when she started said discussions, that would tell her bad things about your mate value to a point where it’d put her off even wanting to get back together and/or stay together long-term.
To wrap this step up, before you go ahead and move on to the communication step below, first take mental note of HOW to handle getting back together discussions, as above. Then, if/when those discussions occur, handle them as I specified.
Step 7. Re-establish contact with your ex-girlfriend in the most attractive way
Given that you’ve had a breakup and are probably feeling a little desperate to have your ex back right now, it’s likely that you’ve been communicating with her in ways that have only made things worse…
Replying instantly to her messages even though she takes hours to reply to yours, begging her to take you back in long texts…these ways of communicating convey LOW mate value, because they reveal desperation – something women know only a LOW mate value man who they shouldn’t want back, would show.
That HAS to stop. You need to start communicating with your ex in a more attractive way…once the no contact phase is over, of course. And that’s why next, I’m going to show you how to get your ex-girlfriend back fast by text message.
Messaging is only a small part of the overall solution to winning an ex-girlfriend back, but there exists a messaging/calling strategy that can ensure you come across more attractively to your ex than you have done recently. This strategy is simple yet extremely powerful. It consists of the following three tips:
− Mimic her reply times
If your ex takes a long time to reply, you should take even longer. This will show her that you’re not desperate to have her back, thereby indicating to her that you’re an in-demand, high mate value man who may well want her, but doesn’t need her.
This is exactly the type of attractive non-verbal message she NEEDS to see from you if she’s going to start feeling attracted to you again. It’s the type of non-verbal cue that most women find themselves INvoluntarily attracted by.
− Try to make your messages to your ex shorter than hers are, or as a maximum, about the same length
This tip tends to work well for the same reason that the previous one does. A low-effort, laidback approach to messaging shows an ex-girlfriend that you aren’t worried about what does or doesn’t happen between you guys…thereby indicating to her that, just like any attractive man is, you’re desirable in the dating market.
− Keep your messages to her playful, lighthearted and positive
Obviously if a message to your ex amuses her, that’s going to help you rebuild a rapport and connection with her. This gives you progress in attracting her back, because the better she feels when she’s interacting with you, the more receptive she’s likely to become to the idea of getting back together.
Because of that, you should look to make your messages to her playful, lighthearted and positive. Leave the serious stuff (mentions of the breakup and getting back together) for later. It’s better not to mention those things in your messages, because like we established in the previous step, before such things should be discussed, first you need to improve how she feels about you so that when such things are discussed, the outcome you want will be more likely.
In any case, ‘us’ discussions are something that should happen face-to-face rather than via messages, as face-to-face is a lot more intimate. The increased intimacy of being able to see, hear and touch each other will enable you to more easily tempt her to change her mind about you; something which is simply too difficult to achieve via messages.
So use messaging as a means for rapport-building and bringing back the good old times that attracted your ex to you in the first place. That way, messaging back and forth with her can become an important stepping-stone in securing a face-to-face meet, where you can then have an ‘us’ discussion in a setting that more favors your desired outcome.
A face-to-face meet will become more and more necessary as time goes on, because in most cases if you are going to be able to get your ex back, it’s most likely going to happen when you see her face-to-face. Why?
Well, as I said, you can affect a woman’s emotions much better face-to-face than you can via messages. And remember, your ex-girlfriend, as a woman, makes her love life decisions based ON emotion.
So given that you can affect her emotions better in person than you can via messages, it becomes clear that seeing her in person is going to be a vital step toward your goal of getting her back.
I say this to make the point that as face-to-face is how getting a girl back generally happens, it’s therefore best to set up your meets with your ex during you guys’ messaging/calling sessions when possible. You probably shouldn’t skip directly TO asking her to meet, because again, you first need to build positive vibes, so that she’ll actually WANT to meet up when you ask her to. BUT inviting her to meet is strongly recommended once you notice that her sentiment towards you is positive.
And again, just to really drive this point home because it’s important: Before you get as far as inviting her to meet, first you should warm her up and re-attract her a bit (build some rapport), so that when you do invite her to meet, she won’t refuse and won’t flake.
My messaging tips as above will do a lot of the heavy lifting to make sure that she will want to meet up with you. Arranging a meet will then become just a natural extension of the fun you guys are already having via messages and calls, and thus she’ll be more likely to agree (to meet).
I have plenty more tips on how to contact your ex-girlfriend in an attractive, high-mate-value-conveying way that can help to tempt her back. It’s all covered in my comprehensive step-by-step video on how to get your ex-girlfriend back. Please watch the video now!
Step 8. Meet up with your ex-girlfriend face-to-face
As I said earlier in this guide on how to get your ex-girlfriend back, meeting up with her is going to be a crucial part of the process. That’s because you need to improve how she feels about you, and that can be done much better face-to-face than it can while apart. Therefore, meeting up with her in person is going to be vital.
Once the no contact rule is finished, you should then arrange to meet up with her pretty much as often as she’s willing. Though do bear in mind, you should keep that to a maximum of twice a week until you’re back together, to show her that you’re a busy guy whose time is scarce and thus valuable, and also to make her feel like she isn’t quite getting enough of you, so that she wants more.
You should arrange to meet up with her for any reason or excuse you can think of, be that to socialize or just to solve some logistical issue like handing possessions back. Any excuse you can think of to make a meet happen so that she’ll see you face-to-face, is a step in the right direction.
When you do meet up with her, your aim should be to, just like with messages and calls, focus on FUN and reminding her what the good old times were like, so that she’ll want those times to come back, i.e. so that she’ll want YOU back. This will however mean avoiding ‘us’ talks and other serious or negative topics where possible, to keep the focus on fun, and keep the vibes positive.
If you’re able to get things to go so well, escalating into intimacy should be the end goal that you carry in the back of your mind for any meet. Why? Because intimacy is the most powerful way that you can positively affect her emotions, and through doing that, further your goal of getting her back.
To help you influence things in the direction of intimacy, I’ve prepared some guidelines you should follow for any meet you’re able to arrange with your ex:
Firstly, no matter where you arrange to meet with her, make sure YOU arrive at that place about ten minutes late (unless it’s at your home of course). This way, you won’t seem desperate to see her, impress her or have her back.
Desperation and the desire to impress are traits women associate with LOWER mate value men, so you don’t want to show them. But if you turn up a little late, that will prevent such traits from getting conveyed at the beginning.
From the first minute you meet, again, try to get the conversation to be relaxed, playful and lighthearted, like fun old times. Because remember, you need to make your ex FEEL like WANTING you back, NOT talk her into it, which doesn’t work.
Try to turn your meet into a SOCIAL thing if it wasn’t one from the start. And if you are able to do that, make sure you sit NEXT to one another rather than across from each other, to make touching easier.
Touching is important because it helps to bring back the closeness and intimacy you guys had before, which can then lead your ex down the path of wanting you back.
I have many more tips on how to get your ex-girlfriend back when you meet up with her face-to-face. We’ve barely scratched the surface of what to do when you see her, but this guide on this webpage is already way too long, so I’m saving the rest of my guidance on getting an ex-girlfriend back for the advanced version of my ex back guide.
What is the advanced version? Well, while the eight steps of this free guide here do show you how to get your ex-girlfriend back, they don’t show you in full, EXact detail. That’s because showing you in full detail would make this webpage more than 100,000 words long, which would be crazy…
So to show you how to get your girlfriend back in the level of detail that you require given how serious this situation is to the trajectory of your future… I created a nine-hour-long video course which goes into the specifics and details of how to win an ex-girlfriend back; the action-steps you must take, and precisely how to do each one.
If you sign up for my advanced ex back guide and thus get all the information you need, your chances of getting this girl back will skyrocket. And I tell you that based on my years of experience helping many guys before you achieve just that success!
Tap the menu at the top of your screen and then tap “Advanced Ex Back Guide” to find out more about and perhaps sign up for, my advanced ex back guide. Do that now, and let’s continue our conversation! See you again shortly.
Best wishes,
Sam
In Summary, Here’s How To Win Your Ex-Girlfriend Back:
- Establish who broke up with who.
- Learn WHY the breakup happened.
- Spend some time apart.
- Improve your body language and vibe.
- Attract her back without contacting her.
- Before directly communicating with your ex-girlfriend again, learn the best way to handle getting back together discussions.
- Re-establish contact with your ex-girlfriend in the most attractive way.
- Meet up with your ex-girlfriend face-to-face.
